I promise to

Never neglect my washing again.  I didn’t wash for a couple of days before Christmas.  I know, I started hitting my head very hard against the wall yesterday.  Oops, same time as worked phoned to say no staff in.  A hard choice, run & hide at work or do washing???  Hmm how fast was I out that door.  At work, more staff than are usually seen thanks to Evelyn and her head-mistress voice so I could go home  I wasn’t dressed for work actually.  I did have the regulation black on but a vest top & yoga pants with a blob of chewing gum stuck to my bum is not the look I go for.   Neither is my ear lobes exposed without the large hoop ear-rings & worse, no make-up  How totally desperate was I to escape.  I did have to go out to the front to sort the till.  How fkn typical to pass a tango with a fit looking guy when I looked like a bag lady!!!!
 
Ah well, home after a McD’s hot choc and the washing didnt improve.  Neither did my mood when I realised to late that one of the black bags I had dropped off at work had washing in it.  I had ran out of laundry bags so had used a black bag.  It got amongst clothes Jamie was tossing and I took them to work.  Not to get sold but to get recycled, ah shit.  3 pairs of next work trousers gone.  Positve, I get to shop.  Okay boring, just work trousers but since Lewis had emptied his entire t-shirt drawer into the same bag, he needs some new stuff too.
 
So, I stomped around all day.  My happy no matter what had blood dripping into my lip from biting it too hard.  I still have washing but I have given myself a good lecture and I hope I listened to the stern voice I gave myself.  My bedroom, there is a choir singing in my ear.  My bedroom is clean, neat and apart from the pile of clothes I cant fit into my drawers or wadrobe its tidy.  My new sleigh bed is up.  Its not going to last long.  I think I had gotten used to my old bed and the new one doesnt look right.  Serves me right for keeping the old one for so long I guess.
 
Apart from washing, cooking, I am seriously bored.  I just want to go back to work now.  I cant believe Hogmany is tomorrow.  At least my shopping is done so none of that rush shopping tomorrow.  Just my black bun & shortbread to get and I’m ready for another fun, fun new year.  I think I may get drunk tomorrow night if I manage to stay awake.
 
Christmas is over and the new year is approaching.  I try to remember that everyone isn’t happy at new year and I always raise a glass to those who are no longer with us but I think I may just lift my glass to the future, just for a change this year.  After all, we who are alive, we must be here for something right.
 
light on
jacqui
 
 
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Its so true

I’m amazed.  I have to say I had a great xmas.  Okay, the kids all had there moans.  Poor Jamie.  His Xbox is not working.  Its what you call gubbed but thats no biggy.  Even having the man given the receipt because I didnt trust myself with it & hes lost it.  Leaving me with a useless games console.  All of that and yet, I got my happy no matter what.
 
When I relax I enjoy the company of my kids, even him.  I enjoy texting my mates.  I enjoy going to my bed and just the silence, its been fab.  Okay, it wasnt so fab this morning when I realised I had over-slept by an hour.  But, but ,but I still had happy.  O jeez, I am such a moaning cow but I know, nothing here to really moan about.
 
Just please, when I grizzle next week when I buy my son his new Xbox, again.  Remind me.  All that I have is so much more than the money I hoard lol..
 
I hope you all are okay and survived the christmas insanity.  I am really looking forward to this New Year.  This week though, I have realised that 2008 has been a better than okay year.
 
Light on
jacqui

on & on

I used to have a sititng room floor.  In it place, a toy room lol..
 
Poor Ja couldnt get his new xbox to work yesterday, he needs some sort of adaptor since his tv is out the arc.  Bad mood was radiated, right back to me.  Kids were demanding the presents I had bought, wrapped and had no idea where the hell they were.  Nicky and his Ds were glued to each other with the tantrums just because he couldnt kill the green goblin.  The crushing blow was I did, oops.
 
I am so glad xmas is over.  Next year 10 presents each, no messing.
 
My christmas dinner was fab.  I just cooked turkey & beef but they all ate it.  The christmas pudding was eaten??  Might buy that again.  It did look strange they  had mountains of food and me??  I had a plate of brussel sprouts.  I love brussel sprouts actually.  Gall bladder moaning meant I wasn’t gonna eat anything more.  I sat yesterday  watching them all.  Everyone went from one eat moment to another.  If it wasn’t choc it was bisuits or mince pies with cream, anything Jeez I’m amazed how much they troff. I couldnt do that, I want to get into my clothes next week.
 
Roll on next week.  I cant wait for Hogmany.  I shall do my reflective shit.  Shut my 2008 journal and look forward to opening a new one.  We dont drink on Hogmany but the drink is out waitng for the bells.  I may have a ginger beer before I head to bed.  I’m not quite sure about 2008.  I suppose its the first year in ages where I have had good positives mingled amonst the crap.
 
That’s next week though, I still got a bit of this year to get through.
 
Light on
jacqui

When tomorrow comes…

I will smile and the small part of me that is already thinking is that it?  will get bigger.  Work was weird.  we sold over 900 raffle tickets and blow me if it wasn’t Noddy’s mother who won.  Weird so before she entered my domain I got out, quickly.  This whole Noddy thing is dragging way to long.
 
I am still wrapping presents.  I had to visit Tesco to get my spoilt brat of a son called Nicky an absolute necessity called Ben 10 for his new nintendo Ds.  A couple of other things and I needed more xmas paper.  The presents that have lived safely in my boiler cupboard for weeks were opened by spoilt brat this morning so they had to be done.  I am so fed up with present wrapping.  200 sticky labels say I bought to much, by tomorrow it’ll be over.  My tidy floor will be hidden under a pile of toys no one will remember this time next week.  Dont you just love christmas.
 
I’m off to 9pm mass.  Weird doing the vigil mass so early but by the time 10pm comes I will be ready for bed.  Just 2kg of carrots to be grated.  2kg of brussel sprouts to top & tail and ham to be cooked for stock.  I dont like prep work but if I do a little tonight, thats a bit less for tomorrow, right??  O I may have a burst of energy and make my trifle tonight.
 
I hope you all have a very happy & peaceful Christmas.
May santa be good to all &Co
Light bright
jacqui

I forgot

A pogo stick.  How could I forget a bloody pogostck??
 
The town where I live has no toy shop so the pogostick will be missing, fk oops.
 
I could pray but I dont see me being lucky.  I have work in a sec and an Argos list for Hope such is the inbalance.  Must dash tho
 
Enjoy xmas eve
jacq

swings or roundabouts

I have psoriasis.  I know that sometimes it feels a little bit worse before it gets better.  The boredom with it hits way before it heals.   I used to say you have to heal your deal before you can finally shift your world.  I think if you miss the heal step and go straight to the shift it comes back & bites your ass.
 
I am having some conflict within my star sign.  I have opposing signs hitting off each other.  Fkn pile of rubbish.  I open my in box and read something and thought Jeez that is spot on.  So I have been told to use patience today.  I’m quite sure they didnt mean with my children but since thats where its needed, thats where its going!!!
 
So I am switching my brain to auto pilot.  I’m going to live within today, hard prospect since I’m home all day.  If I can keep my thoughts in today.  Forget about the past & I do need help with that bit.  Worry less about the future & lots of help needed for that bit too.  I might just find today will be an okay day!!!!
 
I’m still bored tho lol..
light on
jacqui


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o no, more more!!!

I hadnt realised just how much stuff I had bought and stored at my sisters.  I ended up leaving with 4 huge sacks and still managed to leave a bag behind!!!  She hates anything left and she will be most annoyed with me lol..
 
Work lasted much longer than it should have.  Next week is even worse for staff than this week so dont see me getting much time off.  I’m really tired tonight.  All I want to do is go to bed but kids are all watching the simpsons movie, I must wait.  Yet more wrapping was done this evening.  I seem to have managed to lose yet another box of thorntons chocs.  Dont know what happens to them but the box was just mints so cant see the kids going for them.  I bet they are under the piles of clothes I have randomly placed.  I know, I am a slob but who has the time to clean there bedroom.  If anyone does I can forward my address when your free??
 
Confession hhmm, its done.  I have my absolution and I’m good to go.  Its actually very freeing knowing your soul is sin-free, at least it is for me.  I get my penance and I do come out hoping  I wont sin again.  Of course I will but I can try.  I actually dont know anyone who does go to confession apart from me.  Maybe its a dying sacrament??
 
Och I’m boring myself now.   Christmas.  I have forgotten haven’t I.  I have a full shop front of 3 full windows to take apart.  2 christmas trees to take down.  various displays peppered all around waiting for me on Saturday morning.  Ah crap.  Fkn Christmas lives on and I forgot who has to remove it??  Fkn me!!!  I have a plan to replace it with candles since we got another delivery of them this morning but goodness the place is going to go to drab.  We’ve had xmas displays up for so long – I can’t remember what was on them before haha.  O shit.  I knew there was reasons why I never wanted to work in a shop.  I think I thought a magic fairy would come in and take everything down.  I’ve still got christmas to get through and my mind is already into the take-down phase.  Do shops leave there christmas stuff out??  I never notice, such is me!!!
 
I’m off to sprinkle my happy dust on my straggling girls who dont think they need bed even though they’ve been up since 5am.  They maybe young enough to run off the durasel batteries but I run off Tesco’s own and my power has gone..
 
Night night
with a happy light
jacqui