get over myself

Tomorrow work is closed.  I’m sure I would have mentioned the woman in work who grated on my nerves.  The one who wanted to take over when I was ill and generally put me into a bad mood whenever I seen her?  She was in hospital with pneumonia and her lungs couldnt cope.  She was put into an oxygen hood and she died on Sunday.  Her funeral is tomorrow and lots of staff are going.  Not sure everyone understood that we didnt like each other & me being me, I’m not going tomorrow.  I do feel sad for her family but shes gone and me going to her funeral would be hypercritical.

So work has been sombre.  Pat was a very formiddable woman and I guess we all just expected her to recover.  I certainly never imagined she would die.  Anyway work carries on.  Ok, weird spooky thing happened yesterday.  We obviously get black bags of clothes.  We sort through them and since there was loads yesterday I just jumped straight in.   First bag I opened had sweaters in it.  Its fairy obvious, fairly quicky when the clothes are from someone who’s died.  We have to size cube them so I look at neck to check.  Inside is a marks label and a name sticker.  Her tag said j Young.  I thought that was a bit strange, my own name and I felt slightly uneasy.  I continued, opened another bag and the next one had her jackets.  I found out that her name was, Jess, jessie, jessica.  That was enough for me.  My own name spooked me.  Seeing the name of my deceased daughter was just a bit weird so I walked away from the bags.  I kinda put it to the back of my mind but mentioned it to someone who was astounded.

Its only a name I said.  Ok, its always going to be my name but I have an add on so whilst it was a bit weird Im not sure I should read anything into it or should i??