Sympathy Cards

Sympathy can be over the top.  Going to work is fab at distraction but the number of sympathy cards I’ve had has been quite overwhelming.  There was 2 poking thru the door this morning.  One from someone called Nan which everyone thinks is my Nan lol and one unsigned but they’re thinking of me which is lovely but OTT.  I’m wondering if its really sunk in yet cos I’m back in my own life and whilst I miss my Dad I’m not overwhelmed like I think I should be.  I know I should be.  I’m scared that one day I’m going to waken up and the enormity will hit me.

Washing machine is being delivered tomorrow.  I decided to pay for it out my own mnoney rather than use my Dads.  Work folk have different opinions on what to do with it.  Some think it should be spent and others think its cold money since it came from someone dead & I should just get rid of it.  I have decided to spend some of it on something I seen today.  Its a 18ct white gold modern take on a trilogy ring.  3 bands of gold with diamonds set on each band but just one ring.  Buying that spends £500 so its a start and I wont feel guilty about it.

Onto a weird dream.  I dreamt I had toothache.  It was such a vivid dream I thought when I wakened up I’d have toothache except it was just a dream.  It got weirder when I realised the tooth I thought I had toothache in has had root canal treatment and it cant cause toothache.  I would look it up but dreams are just head fucks I cant be dealing with right now.

I’m sitting in my garden listening to my neighbours bitching about teenagers and there imaturity.  Honestly the quicker I get a 6ft fence up the better.  The live in guy of the wk next door thinks its okay to call neighbours children little muppets and all I got for protection is an oversized pair of gucci sunglasses.  I cant even sit in my garden in peace.