manners cost nothing

I so wish I could teach the above to my youngest son. Alas, he thinks he’s above manners. Since he’s only 9yrs old I’m hoping he’ll learn with age.

The weekend passed way to quickly. It was a happy weekend if a little to short. My youngest daughter Hope has finally got a dress she is happy with for her prom. I cannot believe that Primary Schools have proms but they do. Hope had got 2 dresses delivered but neither where quite right. The final dress we actually shopped for so she tried it on & loved it. I even love it lol.

Finally I’m awaiting my new blackberry which will be delivered tomorrow 🙂 I lost a phone when my Dad was dying. I thought it was the end of the world. Of course it wasn’t. Having my phone nicked is inconvenient but that’s all. A new phone will soon get filled up with the numbers. New photo’s will be taken & new dates will be added to my Calendar. A woman who people often mistake for me had a heart attack on Thursday evening. She’s had stents put in & is recovering well. One of her son’s works next door to me. It reminded me that in life it’s not the money you have or the “stuff” you own that’s important. It’s the people who we share life with that make it worth living. Spending time doing things we love with the people who make us smile is priceless. Sometimes I forget that & get bogged down with shit. I need to remember to stop stressing the little stuff that doesn’t mean a thing.


Sad world filled with low life scum

I got my little perfect blackberry stolen from work this morning. It maybe only a phone but it was mine. I had my photo’s on it, my calendar & all my music. I left the counter to attend to something out the back shop. I did ask someone to look after the till. When I came back she was on the shop floor talking to someone & didnt notice when I came back. When I went around our counter my phone had vanished. i phoned it & it had been turned off. My heart sank. I never turn my phone off. I knew before I started to look. It had been nicked. Me being me I hadn’t saved anything. It’s only a phone but well, it was my phone. It was a while before the police phoned me back. I had to wait around when all I wanted to do was leave.

I always knew their was some sad folk but stealing from a counter in a charity shop is seriously scraping the barrel. I’m taking heart that karma is a bitch & they’ll get their payment of it but it still stings. I’ve already bought a new one. Bloody phone insurance is a nightmare. Who keeps the proof of purchase when they buy a phone/ Okay i don’t. I have to pay for the privilege of retaining my original sim card. My faith in the human race doesn’t get shaken often but today it has.

The person that I was talking to this morning was my sister. She has adopted a new cat. His name is snowball & he’s adorable. A huge 10yr old white cat. I don’t do cats but this one has something adorable about him. Its been a very long day & I can’t wait for it to be over.

Ni-night world

Teeny fae Troon

I’m not sure why but my Dad referred to me as Teeny fae Troon. Teeny meaning small haha. I may have been the youngest but I tower above my older sister. Troon is a holiday town in Scotland. I remember visiting it once as a child. Anyway the phrase popped into my head this morning. I had forgotten about it. A silly thing that made my smile. This morning wasn’t one of my best. I spent bits of it looking out our shop window wishing I was on the other side.

Mr Manager came in to work in a bit of a mood. I hate moody people. It’s just not in my make up to be moody. If I have a problem I would much rather share it than let it fester. I know I’m very lucky. I have a lifetime of experience with moody people I can fall back on. I was in my 40’s before I stopped trying the figure out what I had done to cause people’s bad moods. When you let go and allow them to own their moods it stops you getting sucked into their woe or wrath. I admit I find bad moods amusing. I control my own moods and don’t ever play follow the leader so I keep my mood in check & go about my day. Mr Manager bless him tries to not show he’s in a mood but after a lifetime of moody men I can sense them. Thankfully my working day is now over & I’m home.

I seem to be chasing my tail this week. So much to do and it seems to hard to motivate myself to get anything done.. I have a prom dress to organise for Hope. A kilt to be ordered for Nicky’s communion. I have my 2 elder daughters birthday’s next month. Joy will be 14 & 3 days later Jennifer will be 16yrs old. I’ve bought nothing with less than 4wks until the first event. Am I panicking? No but I should be.


Another day

I’m wondering what sort of crisis will hit my world today. I have managed to get kids out to school with the minimum of fuss. I’m about to leave for work. Work, Mr Manager has now been given a permanent position so problems are his now & I know exactly who his problem will be today.


Posted from WordPress for BlackBerry.

Someone’s bored

My name is Jacqui & I’m a stats obsessive. I work with that. I don’t mind that my WordPress icon is the most used on my blackberry. I’m just thrilled that I can actually work a blackberry. I can also jailbreak any ipod & I’m particularly proud of that. Stats today told me that one person hit my archives 30 times this morning. Jeez, that some serious boredom going on lol. Alas it isn’t my usual obsessive since well, they have a job since they search early morning or late evening. I’m just amused that someone would waste and I do mean waste time reading that amount of entries. They’ll never get that time back.

So its today. The anniversary of my daughter’s death. I should have 2 15yr olds. My daughter Jessica died at 6pmish. She wasn’t born until 12.20am. It’s a bit weird having her death date before her birth date but if she had lived she would have been delivered today so today is the date I get out her box. All that I have is 3 photo’s and some other stuff. Her footprints & handprints. A lock of her hair. The bib that I had taken with me that has my tear stains on it. The sympathy cards. The shit things that you never ever want. Stillbirth is like any other kind of death; it just sucks. To go into hospital in labour & have your child die is something I still can’t get my head around. I was so afraid to see her. My first dead body. Anyway its only a memory now. I can put myself back into that time like it happened yesterday but it didnt. It was 15yrs ago. I’ve had 5 other kids since Jessica but I’ve never stopped thinking about her. I know its only me who does that but I was Mum. It didn’t matter that I had another 2 kids. They day she was buried I was numb and I never quite got over the numb feeling. Part of me had died and I didnt quite realise how big an impact that would have on me. I can feel myself getting upset which is okay. This is the one day of the year I allow myself to be selfish & cry for her. Some nights when I’m whispering my goodnight to her I can’t quite believe that even after all these years I never go to sleep without wishing she was here. I’ve long since stopped wondering when that’ll happen. It never will.

Under pressure

I got my gas bill yesterday. That letter with the huge Scottish Gas logo terrifies me. Before I’ve even opened it I know its going to hurt. This bill is for £381.98. Thats my gas bill for a quarter. I don’t put money away for my bills. I just pay it out of my bank & try not to think about it. It’s an awful responsibility juggling household bills as well as trying to juggle to support 6 kids. I’m a parent with the financial burden weighing heavily currently. School blazers for the coming school year are in excess of £200. I know I’m very fortunate that I don’t need to hold my hand out and ask anyone for help but I’m beginning to worry. I haven’t worried about money since well, forever. I’m very good at managing my money. I’m just wondering how I’m going to cope when I run out.


On reflection

This week has been way to busy. I can’t believe I only worked 3 days. Between medical appointments, hairdressers appointments, birthdays, dental appointments & dress shopping its been a juggle of a week. At least my school uniforms are all washed & dried. Good old windy Scotland. It never let’s me down. Even knowing its all sitting on my kitchen table waiting to be ironed isn’t bothering me.

I feel so tired I can’t even be bothered going to bed. My younger son’s are elsewhere tonight. Eldest is in bed asleep as are my 3 daughters. Even little dog Fudge is asleep. Right, I’m going to climb those 14 stairs & head to bed. Ni-night world


Posted from WordPress for BlackBerry.