Today has been a good day. Work was productive & busy. It was a quick day followed by seeing my eldest son. I had thought given it’s his first year in his own home he’d be doing his own thing for Christmas & New Year. He’s working Christmas Eve so is coming here when he finishes at 7am for present opening. I had hoped to get a long lie in bed but a 7am start it’ll be. It must be hard leaving a biggish family. The silence I know gets to him & he admitted he doesn’t fancy not being amongst the chaos on Christmas morning.
Hogmany last year was a drunken shambles. I don’t drink before midnight. I prefer to see in the New Year sober & remain soberish. I like those first moments of a New Year to remember people who are no long in my life. My memory list is growing but I like to acknowledge the people who’ve had an impact on my life. Last year I was surrounded by drunk dafties before the New Year had began. I was the only sober adult & I was not amused. This year my Eldest is going to be here with his Gf & close friends. I’m of the opinion that the more the merrier so long as I get my first moments in peace.
It feels like this is still Jamie’s home. He comes in, banging the front door behind him. He opens the fridge as soon as he’s in & helps himself to whatever he fancies. He opens his mail & discards it on my kitchen table. I tut at him but secretly I’m smiling. I worried so much about what kind of man he’d become when he was growing up. He’s a thoughtful man with a huge conscience & a huge dollop of compassion. The flip side is he takes no shit & can handle himself in any situation. I done a pretty good job with him. Now all I have to do is replicate that with six others.