I wonder why in my dreams I don’t tell people to just fuck off. I seen many people from my past last night. O they soothed about how happy life is. Is it really I asked with little interest. It’s quite strange seeing your own past sitting in front of you. I was too polite to say I don’t give a flying fuck to some of them. I can’t get passed my curiosity of why tell me how happy you all are. As I sat looking at them I started to pick them off one by one. She was self absorbed. He was boring, she was selfish, he was demanding. The list went on until I wanted them all out of my space.
I figured that the sensible thing to do was get them all drunk. As I topped up the drinks only one was smart enough to realise I wasn’t drinking. Staying sober was my way of keeping control. You find out a lot from drunks. I sat gobsmacked as the truth came out. Omg, such hostility, all for me haha. I never buy into hostility. I’m amused when people go to hostility. It’s a clear indication they have a problem, usually guilt. These people though had all brought something to my life. I’m not quite sure what but they must have. I should maybe have thanked them but why would I.
Being happy is a very personal thing. It has nothing to do with anyone else. No one makes any one else happy so I’m confused. I don’t care if people I used to know are happy. Should I though because the nice in me wouldn’t want anyone to be unhappy. Maybe that was the point of the dream. For all my stuff & bluster I wouldn’t do any of them any harm. Parting note to my past. If your happy, good for you. You don’t need to inform me because I won’t be flying the bunting for you. Just jog on doing what your doing.